c o u r a g e -- as it surrounds me, you, us

courage
i am still building that within myself
learning to not be shy about the things i want, while realizing that i do, have everything that i need
but, lately, i have been so encouraged by the people in my life who live and create from such a centered and pure space

purity is relative, i know

pain is sometimes the source of their courage -- from what i know to be true
and i come from an upbringing that resided in covering up the pain and silencing the hurt
so, i get it
i know why i instinctively want to fix what causes confusion and pain
and i know why i sometimes choose not to deal or see it as a place of refuge, strength or peace

-- but i have received so much power watching my friends create and grow beyond their pain and beyond the limits they place on themselves -- no matter how long it takes and how much it hurts

its beautiful and i commend you :)

this courage i've witnessed has been from past and present friends
who never knew i watched and observed the resilience and perseverance
i value the lessons
 and as it continues to surround me, i can't help but see my own reflection

as it stands, i'm in the midst of facing a lot of fears and opportunities at the same time
logically, i know that the outcome has already been determined, and that brings slight pleasure and ease
but emotionally, it's, well, fear
and i know that faith and fear don't work together

so, it's up to me and my choice to endure and confront -- be courageous, or not
left or right?
ego or heart?
intuition or control?

i'm leaning in, as mark nepo always writes in his books
i want to choose faith -- my struggles are unique to me, but i'm not alone
i too have the courage that i admire
we are, of course, of one mind -- many in body

i'm leaning in.

xo, me.