"let us continue our walk along the sea...." -- mark nepo

my latest summer read came in the mail yesterday -- and i'm already on chapter three.
Seven Thousand Ways To Listen, by Mark Nepo is the book and i've been heavily engaged.

he speaks on the practice of willingly opening ourselves up to listen.
and listening isn't only with our ears, but all senses. it's asking ourselves questions such as "do I honor what those around me need, in order to hear?" or "do i help them find their center point of listening?"

this level of listening requires patience and practice, but i know it's achievable.

when i purposely create moments of silence for myself, i hear more of the answers to my many questions, struggles, needs and wants and how to utilize my yearning for discovery to be a moment of healing, for others.

how can we make more of an initiative to listen? to honor the truth of ourselves, to others and God?

my weekly intention.

because when truth is revealed, it is up to me to keep that truth visible. to not allow that truth to go invisible again, and to honor the truth i see in you as well.  it's a beautiful exchange.

..."so at the deepest level, the most essential level, listening entails a constant effect to feel that moment where everything touches everything else."

xo, me.

c o u r a g e -- as it surrounds me, you, us

courage
i am still building that within myself
learning to not be shy about the things i want, while realizing that i do, have everything that i need
but, lately, i have been so encouraged by the people in my life who live and create from such a centered and pure space

purity is relative, i know

pain is sometimes the source of their courage -- from what i know to be true
and i come from an upbringing that resided in covering up the pain and silencing the hurt
so, i get it
i know why i instinctively want to fix what causes confusion and pain
and i know why i sometimes choose not to deal or see it as a place of refuge, strength or peace

-- but i have received so much power watching my friends create and grow beyond their pain and beyond the limits they place on themselves -- no matter how long it takes and how much it hurts

its beautiful and i commend you :)

this courage i've witnessed has been from past and present friends
who never knew i watched and observed the resilience and perseverance
i value the lessons
 and as it continues to surround me, i can't help but see my own reflection

as it stands, i'm in the midst of facing a lot of fears and opportunities at the same time
logically, i know that the outcome has already been determined, and that brings slight pleasure and ease
but emotionally, it's, well, fear
and i know that faith and fear don't work together

so, it's up to me and my choice to endure and confront -- be courageous, or not
left or right?
ego or heart?
intuition or control?

i'm leaning in, as mark nepo always writes in his books
i want to choose faith -- my struggles are unique to me, but i'm not alone
i too have the courage that i admire
we are, of course, of one mind -- many in body

i'm leaning in.

xo, me.

loving, at first sight of ourselves

do you dream Universal beings?

i do. quite often. dreams lift us higher, help us to keep moving and believing in the life we want for ourselves. 

the reading this morning talked about "love at first sight" and remembering when we first experienced love -- like real love. 

the moment we felt complete and whole, like we mattered and safe. when i sat and thought about the moment, it wasn't tied to any romantic relationship, but when i was a child -- and the earliest memories of pleasing my parents and feeling that sense of love that made the world seem as though it was mine. 

we should feel that complete everyday, all day. it is possible. 

the meditation for the reading went into breathing out past -sights and future-sights and really basking in that first-sight of love. the feeling, the face, the air, the warmth, whatever, whomever and wherever it was -- Mark Nepo asked us to hold onto that feeling. 

i did that. and it was so energizing because when i let go of trying to get back to that "feeling" i had with so and so or the feeling i want now, with so and so. it made me feel really good to just feel pleasure in that time when i felt whole and completely me -- with me. 

perhaps we spend too much time trying to love someone else completely, that we alienate ourselves in the process of loving ourselves....the way we should.

we ARE everything we could ever need. we ARE whole, right now, right here. 

so, that's the intention for today. feeling whole, owning my beauty, my body, my present, who i am and LOVING every minute of it. It's me, i am who i am for a reason and all that greatness and power that lives within me is real and very much needed by the world. I am bigger than my past, and much bigger than JUST dreaming of my future. I am living now, not asking question, but accepting and learning. 

it CAN really be that simple. 

xo, me. 

the pausing...

Universal beings?!

are you there? :))

this morning i woke up and read an entry from Mark Nepo's The Book on Awakening this morning and it was all about making tea.

yes, tea!

obviously, his readers wouldn't need directions on making tea, but more importantly, it was about the pausing of life -- to recognize all that we "steep" and "brew", allowing ourselves to sip through life and slowly accept what it is that we are to learn from life.

so, of course, my first cup this morning consisted of me really pausing with every sip and thinking about all the things I'm steeping -- while being thankful for it.

currently no new job contract
spending my reserve money to handle financial responsibilities
working on mentally focusing myself on what IS, instead of what isn't

those are only a few, and yet, i'm pretty proud of myself because it's not easy to accept where I am....
and yet, the passage this morning really allowed me to see that even without having extra money, or a job right now -- i am willing to see my life as perfect and thankful that all my needs are met!

i can honestly say that i am worry free today. no doubts that greatness is already here!!!

i will be writing today and that's just allowing the magic to begin ;))

xo, me.