creating the life

it's been an incredible two days. 
and the Universe is showing me who I am -- one heartfelt blow at a time lol 
it's been tough seeing the mirror and my reflection that i have been associating with right, wrong, bad and good. 

at the same time, i've been hearing how important it is for me to create the life that i want, to have thoughts that encourage me living my own potential. i have been through an intense period of figuring out my passion, putting projects down, picking up new interests and really allowing myself float on the skills and talents that I've been given and have developed. 

i've take steps back and at times, it makes me feel a little crazy. o_0

but, i have been reminded, that if i continue to cling to the thoughts, reactions and conversations that i have been subscribing to, i will continue to create the same life that is no longer working for me. 

i have a love of my life -- but i've been smothering her for the sake of not feeling so good about me. wanting her to see that without me being verbal about. my reactions and actions have suggested that i'm threatened by the fact that her first love is writing -- and though my intentions have never gone that far in my mind, i can see why she feels as though i may be battling with attention and placement in her life. 

if i truly understood her love for writing, i would automatically know that her love for writing is how she functions, breathes and she gets mentally constipated when she doesn't do it. i can sympathize, because i used to feel the exact same way when i was writing full time. you need to release it. 

my actions haven't suggested or been complimentary to my intentions or words. i am willing to do better and become better. i know that the initiative i show will speak volumes before anything i can say.

i intend to show more initiative and not wait to be told or wait to act on what it is i know would be helpful and meaningful to simply take care of. i am learning that i have lived a very privileged life -- and though i've had a great childhood, in a lot of ways, i've been mentally still there -- waiting for directions and validations. i see the woman i am to become.  i see her. i know. she's already here. 

xo, me

i want for you, what you want for you...

good morning Universal beings!

i decided to do a 21 day meditation challenge all about love and i invited my sister and two good friends to do it along with me. the mantra that has been reinforced when considering love is; "i want for you, what you want for you." 

think about that.

i want for you, what YOU want for you.

when i started meditating on that mantra, i began to feel really calm and in a state of acceptance. far too often, we are focused on what it is that we want, that we miss out on what our loved ones want or need, for themselves. 

being in a relationship can create an atmosphere of being blind and deaf to what the essential needs are from our partners. this mantra, which i urge you to try for at least a week, will help you be in a place of acceptance and peace.  Life is all about being happy and joyful! 

when we have been assigned to certain people, it is crucial that we accept our assignment with an understanding that what we want should be respected just as much as the needs of our partners. 

how can you open yourself more to explore the needs of your partner and to listen to those needs, without judgement, excuses or responses?

let's try it!

xo, me. 

let me love, me

hello Universal beings!

it's been a few days -- i have been a little low on energy and self love. But i am growing and pushing through the limits i've places on my self, so i have faith that I will blossom from this feeling very soon. 

magic, right?! :)

i signed up for a yoga newsletter recently, and i read an article that shared this with the readers:

"Unless we are whole and able to find happiness within our lives, we cannot possibly have healthy relationships with others. When we are unable to love ourselves, we seek affection and love from our partners." 

how true is this statement?!! this is precisely what i have been battling with lately and this broke it down quite clear for me. my contract has ended with Sundance and i am in search of my next project -- i told myself before it ended that i would not sink back into a place of sadness and inadequacy. because whatever it is that we feel we are lacking, is because of us -- not others. remember that!

the Universe is soooo good to us, because when we quiet the voices in our heads -- and open our hearts to truly listen to what it is that we need to learn from our circumstances, we are given exactly all the truth we need. 

and this article, was the TRUTH i needed! 

i have been smothering my partner and mostly because i have been unhappy, sad, and really trying to push though the fear of when i will start working again. i must trust and worrying and faith don't mix, i know that much!

so, i do not want my relationship to implode, and i do not want to smother my partner to the point where she distances herself from me. so, i have committed myself to doing things that help me continue to give myself all the loving i need in order to be a better partner, friend, lover and supporter. 

there is no us without me being good to me, first. 

intention for today -- give yourself permission to love yourself today. be it yoga, reading, writing, meditating, whatever you need to do to get back to you -- do it!! :))))

meditation: i align myself with the Universe

xo, me.